Change is a Requisite to a Better Life
“Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. ”
Are you dreaming of a better life? A bigger house, a new car, or a better and more secure future your children? Do you want to start a new business, a new career, or a new life?
Even the most content people would welcome a change. If it means a better life for her and her family, a mom will embrace change. And then, there are some who are desperate for change. Moms trapped in the humdrum of daily toil, career women trying to break free from the rat race, and women who are stuck in a bad relationship.
We would rather battle the demons that we know, than venture into the unknown. Instead of fighting back or breaking free, we often choose to make ourselves small and go to the darkest corner, accepting our faith. It is only when living is almost impossible that we take the free fall.
The first step is always the hardest.
Change is a modification to the accepted and accustomed set of ways, environment, situation and beliefs. People are naturally resistant to change because when confronted something out of the customary – new challenges, environment or way of life, the brain will send out an alert, which will trigger the body to pause, think, and be cautious. The alert triggers are the ones scaring us.
Change is scary and only the brave are can take up the challenge before they run out of choices. Here are some tips to make that first step a lot easier to take.
1. Learn as much as you can
Try to learn as much as you can about your new beginning. When you’re moving, you will want to know everything about the new neighborhood. The unknown giant is fearsome, get to know it and banish all your fears. If you’re trying to start a new business, knowing all the details will give you confidence and a clearer path.
2. Plan it out
Plan your move before taking the plunge. What is the best time to make the change? What do you need to make it a success? The right timing and resources are crucial. If you need help from other people, let them on in the plan too. You might not know what awaits you at the end of the tunnel, but having a plan will help better cope with the surprises.
3. Discuss it with a neutral friend
Are you making the right decision, or are you just risking what you already have? Choosing between what we have and what we stand to have is the most difficult decision to make. Discussing your plans with a neutral friend or friends will give you a clearer and more objective view of the situation.
4. Reevaluate your strengths
Fear of change is more of the fear of failure or making a mistake that would put the welfare and future of our children at risk. To help overcome this fear, take a deep look at yourself. What are your strengths? Look back into your past achievements and failures. What are your winning qualities and what caused the failures? You are at an advantageous place where you can recognize your positive traits, identify past failures, and the reasons behind it.
5. Anticipate challenges
It will be a long and bumpy ride before you can get to a comfortable place again. Expect hurdles, detours, sharp turns and steep climbs. Just focus on the goal and know that you will learn, adapt, survive, grow, and be a stronger and better person.
6. Mixed feelings are common, but focus on the positive
Aside from the hard physical work, you will also have to deal with a lot of emotions. There will be fear, sadness and longing, anger, pity, regret, and helplessness. You will also have excitement, relief, and hope. Let the emotions ride, and always know that you were strong enough to have taken the first step, you will be strong enough to take control of your life and succeed.
7. Mourn the old life, then let go
When things get a little too rough, you would wish you’ve never made the change. You will long for your old life – the usual problems, the uncomplicated schedule, and the long boring hours with nothing to do. Indulge yourself. Take a moment, a day, or a week to mourn your old comfortable life. Then let go. Turn your back to the old and face your brighter, more exciting, and dynamic new life.
To many of us, change means starting back from zero. It means losing everything you’ve work for – the managerial position, the invested emotions, the perceived expertise, the gardens we’ve sown. In reality, change is just a choice for the better. Leaving a job to start your own business is investing and growing your own wealth. Leaving an old house for a bigger one is getting more room. Starting out on a business from home is exploring your possibilities and opportunities. Leaving a bad relationship is loving yourself.
